Balance Life Between Responsibilities and Dreams to be Happy !!!

 

Life doesn’t come with an instruction manual. You….Me n Us…every day we are trying to fulfil our duties and responsibilities making choices which are best under the circumstances.

 Success can have a different meaning for You… Me n Us. Chasing the goals and achieving them, looking for financial security and ultimately leading a prosperous and secure life. But at what cost? Life is passing right before our eyes.

 Do we ever question ourselves as to what we wanted from life for ‘Us’?

Was it a professional success, recognition?? Yes, but at what cost?

After all the achievements and fulfilling our responsibilities… what next?  

Time to take a deep breath and focus on yourself and look back………

Almost all of us have tread on a path that our parents set for us believing it to be the best road to success and happiness.

‘You….Me n Us’ strived hard for the best grades. Then a hunt for a job with a good salary… working overtime for extra perks…..Leading a mechanical life depriving ourselves simple pleasures of life.

Life becomes an endless task always focusing on the future and overlooking our present. 

Every passing moment we are not growing younger. Maybe in our twilight years, we’ll have money and time but not energy nor health to do things in our ‘bucket list’.

When I look around I find many are living balancing their life between responsibilities and their dreams and I'm really very proud of them.

https://www.facebook.com/sudeep.bhattacherjee... His profile says, "Alive..not just surviving." 

                                 

He is fulfiling his responsibilities towards his family and living a life of his dreams.

https://www.facebook.com/chandra.prakash.94849  He left his desk job to be a wedding photographer and a biker....."One day I might disappear in the mountains"

They are two of the few people I know who are following their passion and dreams. They are happy with their decision and they have the support of their families.

At what point of life will you decide to start living for yourself?

So before the time runs out (as it has for me) find a midway… a balance between responsibilities and your dreams.

‘Be an architect of your life plan…pick up a job which enriches you but the most important is to set aside some time to pursue your hobbies, play with kids and engage in activities which give you joy n happiness.

It’s a popular belief that we don’t get a second chance in life. But believe me, it’s not true. Life is always about the choices we make.  Set your priorities and decide as to what you want from life and then choose wisely and maintain a balance.

Don’t set a trap for yourself………..It’s better to die with memories than to live with unfulfilled dreams…

Pic courtesy Anuroop Bhargava  (My foster son, we lost him in 2016 in a road accident. He gave us fond memories to remember him with smiles. We miss you son)

Always remember “each of us is the architect of our happiness.” Martin Seligman

Is Childhood a Burden of Expectations???

 

‘If you have childhood dreams, you should have great parents who let you pursue them……” –Randy Pausch. 

Are we one of such ‘great parents?

In present days the fun of growing up years is missing….. Why? Where have those ‘Wonder Years’ gone?? 

Is it the burden of ‘syllabus bound education’ … ‘Tiger parenting’ or both? 

Who will decide…..? The parent or the child? Our child, who wants to reach out to his dreams.

This little bundle of joy starts exploring the world around him with loving…doting parents, always at an arm away to hold him and support him.

The time flies and the day dawn to start the formal education…..the task of teaching our little monkey to hold a pencil or a book to read and write. 

The search for the best school is on. Of course, we want the best for our kid. But we forget that this ‘time frame’ is a small window of time for a child to learn and develop at a pace which is right for him.

Close your eyes and try to remember the parent teacher’s meetings of your kid. Among the hustle-bustle of the parents, the complaining teachers who point out that the books are not in the bag….. assignments are incomplete…..not attentive in class, the list is endless.

Maybe an iota of truth is in it…….. As a parent, you try to maintain the balance from your end. But often the child is the scapegoat, who stands quietly… head bent…. listening quietly but his silent wails are falling to deaf ears. 

I cannot forget Animesh. He was an average student. But he suddenly started lagging in class. Parents were worried. The class teacher was very vocal in her complains while he listened silently, opening his mouth like a fish gasping to breathe, every now n then. 

It was evident that he wanted to say something. But no one had time to find out what was troubling him….

Later it was found that his mother was busy looking after his two months old sibling. Animesh’s support system suddenly dwindled he was unable to cope with studies on his own. His father was busy with his air force duties.

If only we ever try to hear their views??? What problems…. fears … insecurities they are facing after stepping out of the safe zone of their family????? 

Some questions loom large in front of us…

Why they are inattentive in class…..what are the reasons for not completing the assignments??? 

Is the syllabus bound education, which emphasizes rote learning dampening their creativity or they are burdened with our over expectations? 

Do we ever care to find out the answers? Some of us do while most of us are too busy with our own burdens of life...

Raising a child is an art; It is all about care, affection, understanding and maintaining a balance between our expectations and his dreams.

We should not misunderstand the distinction between loving and possessing. 

“...love them but do not burden them with your thoughts, for they perceive life with their own experiences. We give them birth but their soul is not ours, for their souls would pave a path of their own.”   

You… me … us, we all have to learn a lot about parenting and time management to cater to our kid’s emotional needs, to help them grow into a confident person.

Don’t over-schedule their routine to keep them busy. 

Never expect him/her to get the highest marks. No doubt standards matter but his ability matters a lot. 

Send this message across to them that parents are their friends but a parent first… Parental authority has to be accepted by them.

Our role is to remind them constantly to work hard and keep trying their best. They are worthy and capable of reaching out to their dreams.

We parents most of the time try to live our dreams through our children...Without a doubt, we have to accept the brutal fact that our kids would grow into a ‘Whole Person’ with their thought processes, ideologies beliefs and values.

We should refrain from conditioning our child into a ‘mini us’ to fulfil our lost dreams.

Undoubtedly we are their support system and the support system is very important for every individual…. Be it a child, an adolescent or elders. All of us are surrounded by an invisible support system provided by nature. No one is abandoned on this planet called Earth.

Like a frail...delicate creeper climbs up with the support of a tree, a fence or a wall…. But the support never shirks or takes away the beauty of that creeper plant, but they stand firm together, side by side. 

Similarly, the child grows with parental support and learns to stand confidently.

pic courtesy:https://www.facebook.com/plantae.paradise.5(Col. Maneet Singh Dwara)

Give them firm ‘Roots’ to grow into a confident person… encourage them to flap their ‘Wings’ of imagination to soar high to wider horizons. 

These ‘Roots’ would help them to bind with the family, culture, heritage and while ‘Wings’ would help them to achieve their goals. 

My 33 years of teaching career as a school teacher has been an eye-opener. This journey has taught me lessons in life. How we elders mess up with parenting.  

LIfe after Death of Internet and Smartphones

What would be lifelike without internet and smartphones? This very idea is frightening…

The life would come to stand still for a few minutes, with stunned bystanders not knowing what has hit them?

In this digital era, none of us can come to the terms of life without the INTERNET. This is an unheard term….. The normal reaction of an internet addict would be …. What the f….!!!  Have you gone crazy????

But let’s visualize life without internet. I would not go into the technicalities of digital era….. Yes, the impact would be disastrous to some extent but let’s see the funny side of it.

It won’t have much impact on the bygone generation, which grew up with books, landline phones, playing games, climbing trees and watching Doordarshan. Life was simple for them. They toiled and worked hard to survive in life.

In this era the knowledge, entertainment, studies…. everything is in the right click of the first button.  The books are a rarity with Kindle, Goodreads presenting digital books for bookworms. 

But with the changed scenario, the tables would turn. No more digital book, just a blank screen.

To state in the simplest words, the world would go into shock mode especially the present generation. They are growing up with these latest technologies and are totally dependent on it.

With Google disappearing from the scene, our youth of the 21^st century would be literally paralyzed without spellcheck, grammar check and other writing tools.

Today variety of information, knowledge, from every field, comes ready-made, on a platter from these search engines. Their only effort in getting the assignment ready is to cut n paste and rephrase it with writing tools.

Their life would be like “a Fish without water” it would suck……

In the absence of social media …… what would happen to the 24/7 active subscribers of Facebook, who love to post regular status updates and selfies from every possible angle n pose? Imagine their plight; they would go berserk with inferiority complex with no thumbs-up sign.

The tweets ….. Where would Twitter be if birds stop tweeting???….. No more nonsense. Their chirping presence would be welcomed out in the open space.

Well, it won't be a depressing scene for everyone……. How???

Everyone is not dumb, the world is full of street smart people. This sudden crash will prove to be a boon for some opportunists; many would eagerly try to cash it.

With internet crash, the e-commerce, online sales, communication would come to standstill, total lockdown minus COVID 19. The rat race, to be first to grab the possibilities would begin……..

No line of communication without email…… that obsolete postal services would make a comeback along with it our old habits of writing letters.….. The e-companies definitely would line up to own the rights of postal services and create their own delivery channels.

Online digital entertainment crackled and blank screen staring back at us….. No problem…. Prime, Netflix, Hotstar, would change their business strategy. 

They would start selling CDs and DVDs. Every city would be having its outlet. They are back in business with record sales in their share…

 Video parlours which were on the brink of closing down would be back with a bang!!! CD/DVD players would be sold like hotcakes.

Wait, did I miss something?????

Yes, the hackers…. Scammers… people with remarkable abilities, working successfully from the darknet. What about them?

Time for them to surface in human form from “incognito’ presence and offer their services in some productive work.

Well, these are just hypothetical situations. Technology has advanced by leaps and bounds. The Human race has survived against many odds and it would come out from this hypothetical catastrophe too. So smile…… Cheerio!!!!!

PS - While I was busy penning down these lines and was about to upload it, to my surprise my laptop almost crashed and I was staring at the blank screen. That was the moment of realisation, yes, life would be boring without the internet. This little window opened the whole new world for me. I met so many people and shared experiences, learnt so much about our interests, hobbies... I would definitely like to stay connected to this beautiful world through the internet. 

A New Beginning in Twilight Years !!!!

I always wanted to pen down my thoughts. My retirement plan was to devote time to my ‘Me time’ to do two things in my bucket list….. Road tripping across India, and online work (teaching n content writing). 

I did go for a Mobike trip to Uttrakhand for a week on Royal Enfield Himalayan with my son. It was a road trip to remember. 

                                              

I enjoyed it thoroughly. I was young once again at 64. It was an experience to remember.

Unfortunately, the Covid-19 pandemic stalled my plans to travel, so I decided to switch over to writing.

While browsing I came across ‘Work n hire, site. I created an account and landed with my first Content Writing project meant for freshers.

I grabbed the opportunity; it was an entirely new experience. The handler was very supportive and guided me through 30+ assignments.

 It was an exciting journey but the payment was pathetic. No doubt the plus point was I learnt the writing skills needed to become a content writer.

I had joined an entirely new field ….. I learnt about plagiarism, SEO/keywords, writing strategies….. The list is long.

After a few more experiences it was evident that I must train myself in this new field to be a successful content writer.

About a week back an ad flashed on my Facebook wall, ‘ContentVidhya - Learn Content Writing!” https://www.facebook.com/contentvidhya

Unlike other intimidating, boring corporate ads on custom made templates, it had a simplistic approach.

Something clicked ….. Firstly it was a very client-friendly, simple and straight forward, a professional approach with a personal touch and secondly affordable.

pic courtesy:https://www.facebook.com/contentvidhya/

It was a God-sent opportunity and without giving a second thought I enrolled for the course. I waited excitedly for the classes to begin.

I was a bit nervous in the starting but overcame my fear of unknown. Our Guide UmaMadhavi connected with us immediately. She has come up with sheer grit and hard work. 

The workshop dealt from basics to a higher level. I knew I have a lot to learn.

Assignment guidelines, introduction to different types of writing styles, use of power words n key words, choosing our niche, developing writing skills, the power of social media in promotion of content writing.

  All the possible strategies were discussed and apparently, my stumbling steps were getting firm ground. I was on my way to improve the skills a content writer should have.

Each day assignment was given. Voila!!! I successfully submitted it in time. It proved true that ‘start writing and work towards perfection, don’t wait for perfection to start your journey.’ ContentVidhya

Last but not least the 5 step portfolio guidelines, to announce our entry on the different social platforms, was the ultimate. I was unaware of this side of the strategy.

Above all, I loved the shrewd business strategy when we were asked to write about our journey of the last 6 days with Content Vidhya and post it on our blogs.

Undoubtedly it’s a smart move ….. We divert our subscriber’s attention in our trainers and get them interested. This is how the business is generated.

My journey of the last 6 days was an informative experience and remarkably exciting.

In my future efforts if mistakes are committed, no problem “we learn from our own mistakes as there is no readymade package for success." I feel to establish myself as a Content Writer, there is a lot more to learn.

Thank you Content Vidhya for giving me a chance to polish my writing skills.

You, Me.. n Us we all have to keep learning to enhance our skills and knowledge.

A new beginning always waits for us around the corner. All of us are gifted …. We just have to find a little ‘Me Time’ to devote to ourselves and find that gift!!!!!